Once again, E3 predictions and pre-show streams are flying across the web. As a result, everyone and their nonspecific grandpa (we'll get to that) is freaking out about who's going to showcase what. But truth be told, this is likely to be a slow year for all the major "hardcore" players tied in with Sony and Microsoft. Nintendo, however, has other plans.
Satoru Iwata recently presented a stream via Nintendo Direct where he discussed some of the features for the upcoming Wii U, Nintendo's ultimate weapon (or so we assume) in the continual console wars.
Between awkwardly familiar looking remote controls, and even more awkwardly disturbing possibilities with the Wii U controller's camera, here are some highlights from the brief yet satisfying presentation.
Likely the most eye catching peripheral aside from what some call a glorified "iPad ripoff," the Wii U "Pro Controller" is what the "Classic Controller" probably should have been ages ago. In fact, speaking of the term "ripoff," it looks an awful lot like an Xbox 360 controller. But who cares, right? After all, Nintendo gave us the next-gen analog thumbstick many years back, and plenty of companies adopted it in more creative ways. This seems to be the age of exchanging innovations for innovations, and simply... recycling ideas we've seen before.
But in all seriousness, this should be a treat for hardcore audiences who question Nintendo's ability to keep up with the times.
Going online (for real this time)
It's kind of ironic how Iwata briefly mentioned the original Wii changing the relationship between "your TV and the internet." Most people spent the past six years complaining about the Wii Shop Channel's inability to properly market a product, and the fact that every single social "connection" relied on a series of codes nobody took the time to remember.
But hey, Iwata is highly charismatic and he promises they'll get it right this time. Along with the newly implemented "Miiverse," the Wii U will feature a seemingly ingenious array of social communication platforms designed to improve both gaming experiences and online interactions as a whole. One strange segment even displayed how the new networking capabilities, also described by Iwata as a "social window," can even help players get out of a bind if they're stuck in a game. With newly implemented social tools (which actually look quite nifty on the Wii U remote) and an all new interface, we can only hope Nintendo's ready to embrace the internet for everything it is. Which brings me to...
Going pornographic (hopefully not, but... probably)
If you were on any social network (Twitter, Facebook, etc.) during the presentation, you were treated to a barrage of responses like this when everyone discovered the Wii U remote could record videos and send them to your TV: "holy hell, porn fest!"
Nintendo: Improving the way we communicate with nonspecific grandpas since 2012.
As nice as it would be to pretend like we're not going to see Wii U-related porn (and who knows what with the controllers involved), let's face it -- we live in a society where if cameras are implemented, X-rated endeavors are likely to follow. In fact, I'm surprised people didn't predict an apocalypse of ungodly stickers slapped on back alley dumpsters when the Game Boy Camera released in the 90s. Then again, times were different back then, and many of us weren't old enough (or bored enough) to make these assumptions.
So these were some of the buzz topics regarding Iwata's 30-minute soapbox moment. Overall, were there any features (or disturbing moments) you thought stood out?
If you have a moment, you can also rewatch the entire presentation here.